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posted on 17/6/2022 14:03Not done for a while: The week In tory - Gramsci.

courtesy of @RussInCheshire

1. Let’s start with spindly, posturing mantis Jacob Rees-Mogg, who this week blocked a bill that spares elephants from torture
2. As foodbank use reached 2.6 million, JRM spent £1400 per person for ministers to learn how to create a “powerful personal presence” 
3. Last year Lord Geidt, Boris Johnson’s ethics advisor – think of it as like being Shane MacGowan’s dental hygienist – had said his resignation would be a “last resort” and would only be used to send “a critical signal into the public domain”
4. This week he resigned 
5. Geidt said prime minister and abandoned candyfloss Boris Johnson had placed him in an “odious” position by asking him to approve (another) breach of the ministerial code
6. Johnson has had 2 ethics advisors, and they have both resigned over Johnson’s irredeemable behaviour 
7. John Penrose, govt anti-corruption tsar, said “You can’t just pretend it doesn’t matter”, and also quit
8. But the truth is, it doesn’t matter to Johnson, who is now reported to be scrapping the ethics role, meaning there will – quite literally – be no ethics in Downing St 
9. The govt’s new “cost of living” tsar was discovered to have said Johnson should resign over PartyGate and the overwhelming tsunami of other ethics breaches and corruption
10. He also said Johnson “lacks intelligence” 
11. Speaking of lacking intelligence, deep-cover minister for gibberish Grant Shapps was reportedly considering temporary visas for EU workers to sort out our airport chaos, which is the worst in Europe because we threw out EU workers 
12. Airlines bosses said “idiot ministers” and Brexit are to blame for the crisis
13. Shapps said it was cos airlines overbooked seats
14. So obviously Peter Bone, a child’s drawing of his vampire grandad, said the govt should deliberately overbook deportation flights Rwanda 
15. A number of things have subtly changed since the Rwanda plan was first announced by Priti Patel, a smirking, razor-faced ghoul with all the warmth and tenderness of a Klingon backstreet abortionist. I will now describe them... 
16. Patel had promised she’d only deport asylum seekers after they’d been vetted by an independent watchdog
17. The watchdog hasn’t been set up
18. She had promised children would not be deported to Rwanda
19. Her policy treats children the same as adults 
20. She had promised people would be processed in Rwanda and, if accepted, could return to the UK
21. Deportees can’t return to the UK under any circumstances
22. And in April she promised “tens of thousands” would be resettled. Oh is that right, Priti? 
23. By May the promise had dropped from tens of thousands to “about 300”, and at that rate it would take Patel 34 years to meet her original target
24. Then the promised number of deportations dropped to 50
25. Then to 30
26. Then to “fewer than 10” 
27. A govt source said “we will operate the flight even if there is just 1 person on it”
28. Patel said the policy was “about securing value for money”
29. She paid Rwanda £120 million, hired a jet at £500,000, and by this week was deporting just 7 people 
30. Patel said the policy “would act as a deterrent to people crossing the channel”
31. The day she announced the deterrent, 116 crossed the channel in boats
32.On Tuesday 260 people crossed, an increase of 124%. Excellent deterring, Priti! 

- “The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.” - George Orwell -

  • Not done for a while: The week In tory - Gramsci. 17/6 14:03 (read 98 times, 2 posts in thread)